It’s hard to admit I have trust issues in my marriage. Even sitting in front of our therapist, his direct question hanging in the air between us… Do you trust him? …I wanted to say, “Yes, of course, I do. He’s my husband. Why wouldn’t I?” But instead I gave a very clumsy, complicated answer,…
Last night I yawned, and stretched, and he reached over, tweaked my nipple and ruined my stretch. We both laughed…because it’s an inside joke…something he always does (or used to, when we were okay). The night before, he smacked my ass with a wooden spoon (the one he uses to itch beneath his cast) when…
There are a lot of great quotes and poems out there about the positives surrounding the dark. It is the only time we can see the stars, for example. The winter clears the branches and let’s the light in. Darkness appears to be necessary in many ways, even though it often gets a bad reputation…
I’m not good at being vulnerable, and I think that may have a lot to do with why I have a blog like this. Confessional writing gives me the opportunity to be vulnerable…safely. You can’t see me. Most of you don’t even know me, though you may feel you do (and rightfully so, in many…
No long term relationship is the same. Some are easier than others, but just because a relationship is “difficult” does not make it wrong. Every relationship has its own languages, both verbal and non, and what works for one may not work for another. It is easy to judge from the outside…and so difficult to…
It’s been awhile since I shared an image. I haven’t been pleased with what I see in the mirror lately…for more than one reason. I also haven’t felt terribly sexy or sensual. Mostly, my life has been sports bras and functional, comfortable cotton. I haven’t shaved or buffed or scrubbed or polished. I’ve showered, and…
It’s an overcast fall day. I’m sitting in my truck, spiced-chai eggnog latte steaming in the cupholder, typing this entry while my son gears up for a soccer game. I’m alone in the quiet…the only sounds the tapping of keys, the whoosh of passing cars behind me, and the yells of kids and coaches in…
When things get difficult, I have a tendency to bear down…to grit my teeth, tense my shoulders, and push my way through. Or…I shut down altogether. A lesson I could (and should) follow, instead, is to lean in. I read a story recently about a boy who was pass a set of Chinese handcuffs in…
Each weekday morning, I follow a particular routine. I get up, let the dogs out (and back in), I get coffee, I check my schedule for the day and figure out how best to prioritize my time, and then I get to the business of journaling. I don’t usually share this journaling, because it’s just…
Have you ever let yourself float on the top of moving water, in a pool or on the lake? I know some people who have grown up swimming on a regular basis might not get what I’m describing here, but for the rest of us…have you ever had that sudden panic feeling in your stomach…
It’s likely to be a bit of a rambling hodge-podge today. Things are a bit of a swirling mess in my head, and I’m trying to find clarity. First off, I stopped doing Noom. Just over a month, and I gained 4 pounds on the program. Not really the direction I was trying to go,…