It’s been awhile since I wrote a short story, so it only makes perfect sense that my first story in months be absolutely terrible…on purpose! Takes a bit of the pressure off, eh? Anyhow, as I considered what I might write for the #EuphOff Christmas Edition, I couldn’t stop thinking about those naughty little elves on the shelf. There are a lot of reasons I don’t have one in my house. Not only do I find them a touch creepy, I also know my husband and son would have entirely too much fun putting it in compromising situations. So, without further ado… “Oh, Gustave! Fuck me harder!” Sparkle flipped her glitter-dusted,…