• Experience

    Who Decides the Foundations of a D/s Relationship?

    Some time ago, Mr. D asked me to really think about how I wanted D/s to play out in our lives…what I want from it, how much, how often, etc. I haven’t really been putting it off intentionally. Rather, I’ve pulled it from my central focus so that it could reside equally (among other topics) in our current conversation about fulfilling each other’s fantasies. See, I know He’s reticent to try anything we’ve tried before and failed at. He’s afraid to commit His time and energy to something only to have me pull away from it. The thing is, we’re not in the same place we were when His desperation…

  • 30 Days of D/s,  Experience,  Opinion

    D/s Doesn’t Always (or Ever) Have to Be About Sex

    This post is #20 in my 30 Days of D/s series. If you’d like to read more, please visit my 30 Days of D/s page for the complete inventory of posts.  Tonight, as I looked at my new workout video and talked out loud about what I need to do to really lose weight, I told Mr. D that it would help if he told me I had to do it…if he’d add a Saturday and Sunday workout to my rules. Snap. Done. Just like that. And yes, in my mind, it instantly became a “have to” rather than a “maybe I’ll give it a try.” When I have to ask to spend…

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