• 30 Dirty Questions,  EROBLOPOMO

    What are your sexual fears?

    I’m sort of like a feral cat when it comes to new sexual experiences. I have to be lured, convinced, prodded, bribed. But then, I’m sort of hard-wired to be suspicious of change and newness in all regards. I’m a fan of comfort, planning, and knowing what to expect (which is why we both get so bored in the bedroom and why our sex life has become so dull). That’s not to say that I don’t love a surprise from time to time. Presents are lovely. But a surprise party? Nope. That would do this introvert in. Surprising me with a multi-partner sexual experience? Terror. Putting me in any new…

  • 30 Dirty Questions,  EROBLOPOMO

    So, we have a sex therapist now…

    And the first session was actually surprisingly good. I’ll be honest,  after 4 crummy marriage counselors who just didn’t get us, it was refreshing to have one who had no trouble focusing on our problem, rather than “attachment issues.” We are plenty “attached.” But we do have issues with trust, resentment, communication, libido, and intimacy. And this guy grabbed those things right away in our individual sessions with some very pointed questions. He then used our joint session to craft a plan of attack. As a type A girl who loves lists and productivity, I was happy to leave with a collection of things to do over the two weeks…

  • 30 Dirty Questions,  EROBLOPOMO

    What do you want more of?

    Fingers entwined, holding each other on the couch, snuggling into your warmth, periodically kissing your bicep, breathing you in like a drug…that heady spin I get from a deep inhalation of your scent. Your arms wrapped around me at the end of the day, taking me in, blocking the world out…my cheek against your shoulder, or buried in your neck. Kisses held longer, at times no one expects…right before I leave for work, your tongue chasing mine, your hands on my breasts, on my cunt. Time alone, exploring each other’s souls and skin. Your hand twisted up in my hair, pulling…holding me down…words spoken hungrily through clenched teeth…your eyes, unblinking,…

  • 30 Dirty Questions,  EROBLOPOMO

    If I could go back and do it again…

    Oh, I would. Those early days with my husband were so primal and I was so utterly smitten from the start. I spent the majority of my time, heart racing, body tingling, in a fog of blissful, sexually-tinged euphoria. So when our sex therapist (yes, we have one of those now) told us that one thing we needed to change was our perception of each other as man and wife, and rather, go back to seeing ourselves as boyfriend and girlfriend, it sort of made sense. Those were, after all, the carefree days of “new” and “exciting”. They days when we were trying to impress one another, working to keep…

  • 30 Dirty Questions,  EROBLOPOMO,  Poetry

    Last Night

    This poem’s structure was borrowed from Mary Oliver’s poem Gratitude. Last Night What did you notice? The dim light from the nightstand lamp created a spotlight effect holding us in a full moon on the stage of our bed. The rest of the world became darkness, shadowed corners like faceless voyeurs silently watching. What did you hear? My own breath in my chest, filling my ears like the rushing of water. The soft things you said, “I love all of this,” as you identified all of the parts of me that I struggle to love myself. What did you admire? The strength of your vulnerability, how you exposed yourself and…

  • 30 Dirty Questions,  EROBLOPOMO,  Poetry

    Metamorphosis

    Over the years, I have watched your body change, slowly, like a glacier adding layers, the white snow falling around your ears, laying claim to the hills and valleys of your face, the bright blue of your eyes softening to grey, crevices, lines blossoming over time, an overall roughening. Your landscape is settling, harder in places, more brittle in others. And beneath what others see there are the dark, wet caves of your masculinity, secret coves of lush growth. I run my fingers through your dense forests, trees still erect and hungry for the light. And there are also hidden dens where hurt resides. I see those, and love them,…

  • 30 Dirty Questions,  EROBLOPOMO,  Opinion

    How do you revive foreplay? (20 Ideas)

    I LOVE foreplay. I’d say it’s my favorite part of a sexual experience (and honestly sometimes it has been better than the actual sex), but that’s not always true. The thing I like about foreplay is the build up. Foreplay can happen all day long…comments, texts, phone calls, glances…anything that assures or hints that sex is or could be on the way…at some point. It’s like waiting for the climax in a book or a movie. And my body reacts in the same way, faster breathing, widened pupils, tingling, muscle tightening. Of course, the climax of “the story” is wonderful, too…but it doesn’t last as long (usually), and sometimes there…

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