It really is kind of funny: when Mr. D cracks my ass, my dog goes into overdrive.
Her tail goes between her legs, she runs around the room…anxious and worried, jumping up, putting her paws on the edge of the bed, sniffing me and making sure I’m okay. She requires a lot of “petting” (verbal assurances) that the world is still right.
Last night, after a heavenly back rub, we went through this silly play. He smacked my naked ass, wide open palm (which means quite a reverberating sound), and she lost her mind, tearing from one side of the bed to the other.
It’s hard to know what exactly is going on in her brain, but it’s obvious that the whole situation makes her highly nervous, and it probably confuses her. She, like so many uninformed, busybodies in society, just don’t get that yes, Daddy’s hurting me, but I like it.
And, we can no more make her understand that than we can the outside world.
And so, we tell her to go back to her bed and mind her own damn business…just like everyone else who thinks they know better than us about what goes on in our bedroom.
This is not abuse. No matter how nervous and anxious it might make some people (and my dog)…
There is prior consent. No matter how crazy some might think I am for giving that. Because I have consented, He spanks me pretty much whenever He darn well feels like it… not just because I’ve done something “bad.” Most often, it’s just because it brings a smile to His face.
There is ongoing communication. We talk about the level of pain I can handle, He listens to my needs and wants. He knows where my limits lie.
There is mutual respect. He appreciates what I provide Him. He loves me. He gives aftercare (a nice rub of the hand against that stinging skin is like butter against a burn). I look to Him for guidance, protection…and I love what Dominance does to Him…to us.
We do not have a history of abuse. Neither of us were abused as children…we do not have a warped vision of what love should be. There are no psychological issues that would lead us to crave or seek abusive relationships.
We are healthy adults who have confidently opted to engage in a power dynamic because it brings out the best in each of us and introduces balance to our relationship.
I tried having this conversation with my dog, but she just didn’t get it.