I spent too many minutes on social media today…something I’m just not supposed to do (according to me) because all that negativity brings me down. More than anything, I have trouble with the fact that it makes me feel silenced. I can’t share my opinion without bringing a shit storm of insanity back on myself, so instead, I hide what I think and feel because my sometimes unpopular opinion is not welcome in this narrative.
It’s not that I can’t say what I want. It’s that I can’t say it without encountering anger in response. And really…it doesn’t matter what I say – there will be people who come back at me to argue and blame and point fingers.
I’m an American citizen, and I deeply value the protection and promise of the first amendment, but in today’s world, it seems that only certain voices are allowed to be heard (even though our Constitution intentionally protects unpopular opinions so that every voice is heard). And ironically, they are the voices who complain the loudest about other people’s voices being silenced. I am politically moderate, and I often feel caught between a rock and a hard place.
We all have personal reasons for our emotional reactions to things…personal reasons that others have no idea about. Stories that nobody knows. But those reasons don’t matter when all you have is 140 characters to share. And so I don’t. I post yet another picture of my cats and hope to see a few pictures of my friends’ kids amidst all of the soapboxes.
I’ve muted quite a few of my friends and family members and acquaintances over the past few months…even more in the past few days. It’s not about creating an echo chamber, it’s about sparing my personal sanity. I know what is happening in the world today. I don’t need to be constantly confronted with it every time I check my facebook or twitter feed.
I believe it’s mindful and responsible to set boundaries when it comes to social media. I know this isn’t a sexy post…but it’s the best I could do tonight.
Because I’m tired.
I know there are those who will say I I have no right to be tired, given the current circumstances of the world. That my fatigue is a luxury of my privilege.
And that’s fine, everyone is entitled to their opinion.
But they don’t know me…or my life…or the people I love. And therefore…they have no idea. No fucking clue.
And that’s where I’ll leave it. For now.