A wish isn’t enough. Neither is an intention. Those are weak, too easy to forget. No. I’m making a promise.
I crave the perfect balance between naughty and nice in our sex life: fucking and making love, kink and romance, petting and spanking. But, it’s hard to know when I’ll crave what. That’s what drives Mr. D crazy…because he craves naughty pretty much all the time. He knows I need nice, though, and he delivers: cuddling on the couch, kisses, hugs, romantic sex.
I’m not as good at delivering what He needs, though, and the silly part of this is that I need that stuff, too. And the more “naughty” stuff we do, the more I look forward to it.
The problem is that I need breaks from it, and once He’s started down the naughty path, he’s an unstoppable trailblazer.
Like our unmatched sex drives, this is another area where we don’t match up. He has a high sex drive and prefers “naughty” sex…fucking, “strange pussy” (what He calls fucking someone new), spanking, adventure, while I have a lower/intermittent sex drive and prefer “nice” sex…missionary style, romance, and the same old expected stuff.
But, I get bored with it. It’s a conundrum, really. I get bored with what I prefer. However, when I try new, I pull back when things get too “new” or too “uncomfortable.” Mr. D tends to push things at that point, because that’s what He likes…the new…the different.
I’m there, though. I need new, too. I need a revamp.
While I’m not into resolutions, I am into goals and setting intentions. However, as I stated earlier, an intention isn’t enough.
This year, I’m looking to improve the blog, but this blog is partially based on my experience. Not just any experience, either. No…specifically my sexual experience. And I’m bored writing about the same old shit.
The problem is, I’m not going to have anything new to write about unless I do something new.
Yep. I admitted it.
And that means I’m at a crossroads.
I don’t think it means I have to change everything about my sex life or start fucking stuffed animals or become a prostitute and start writing a diary (nothing against prostitutes…it just isn’t for me). It means trying some new things.
And that means taking a good long look at my Erotic Bucket List, adding to it, and committing to trying some of those things. It also means stepping up our D/s game. And finally, it means opening up about it more than I already do.
Getting sexually creative, letting go of inhibitions, and opening up to tell my story. That’s my plan for 2020.
Just this morning, I read a post by Floss where she explains her top 20 things to do in 2020. The first 19 are all “fuck” and her 20th is “blog projects.” While I might not fill in all 19 of my top to-do’s this year with “fucking,” having sex in lots of different ways is definitely in my top 5 for 2020.
So there…my goal…no…my promise is to be at least a little bit naughtier in 2020, and I’m sure He’ll be pleased to help me out with this.
I’ll gladly take ideas for my bucket list!