A few weeks ago it was a forgotten “no panties” Friday.

Last week it was two forgotten receipts.

These are things I’m supposed to do, per our D/s agreement.

And, per our D/s agreement, if I don’t, He’s supposed to do something about it. Recently, the punishments have involved a wooden spoon with holes in it. It stings like a bitch.

Yesterday, I noticed my gas gauge was lower than 1/2 (another of His requirements is that I keep it about half, as I am very guilty of letting it get too close to empty…I realize this is an issue of safety, and that having a full tank may be necessary in an emergency). I thought I could slide until tomorrow. I didn’t think He’d have any reason to be driving my truck, and so I assumed I’d be able to get away with it. The sad part of this is that I actually noticed and that I consciously decided to break the rule. Usually, I do things like this without thought, and even though I haven’t done it on purpose, I still often get a punishment.

Take the forgotten receipts. I’m supposed to keep my receipts throughout the week and then provide them to Him when He does the bills/checkbook on the weekend. Invariably, I lose one or two or forget to ask for a copy when I get something small like a coffee. Even though there is often a punishment for this, I haven’t done anything to directly subvert His expectations of me. And I walk away feeling okay about myself…maybe a little remorseful for having been lackluster at following through, but not guilty. 

The gas-gauge thing…I thought that through. I actually decided not to do something I knew He wanted me to do.

So, last night’s spanking…I deserved it.

It isn’t often that I thank Him for punishing me, but this time, I need to.

Also, in the consideration of this, I reviewed our rules (which I really should do more often…like weekly. There are some things that have fallen by the wayside.

I’m not:
writing EVERY day
working out
sending a photo every time I masturbate
sharing my progress with training myself to squirt on command (hell, I’m not even training myself)
shaving weekly (I’m letting that get way out of control)
sending videos/pics to Him weekly
placing myself out of my sexual comfort zone monthly

So, I suppose this weekend’s “marriage talk” should probably involve a re-evaluation and discussion of these rules. We’ve both let them be sort of “forgotten.” And while I am responsible for living up to them, even when He isn’t looking, He is responsible for holding me to them. This D/s thing is a shared responsibility that I think we both need to focus more on because it makes us better people when we do it successfully. That means, I shouldn’t be the only one reviewing the rules. Because we all know…a rule that isn’t enforcedisn’t a rule.

7 Replies to “Journal: (a rule that isn’t enforced isn’t a rule)”

  1. Communication is key. I learnt the hard way, of course, I wasn’t given option to discuss any tasks/rules – except when I had to address extended insertion of a my first plug. A heavy metal one. Bad advice with lube and other aspects. I do hope you find an agreeable solution
    Swirly 🌻

  2. Yeah I agree if that rules aren’t enforced they aren’t rules, which is kinda why we don’t seem to have any anymore, as MrH doesn’t want to enforce them.

  3. Oh this totally resonates with me. If a rule is not enforced, I let them slide too… I really want to be punished if I had broken one of the rules. I hate being punished, but I hate it even more when I am not punished when I should be.

    Rebel xox

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