Journal: (a rule that isn’t enforced isn’t a rule)

A few weeks ago it was a forgotten “no panties” Friday.

Last week it was two forgotten receipts.

These are things I’m supposed to do, per our D/s agreement.

And, per our D/s agreement, if I don’t, He’s supposed to do something about it. Recently, the punishments have involved a wooden spoon with holes in it. It stings like a bitch.

Yesterday, I noticed my gas gauge was lower than 1/2 (another of His requirements is that I keep it about half, as I am very guilty of letting it get too close to empty…I realize this is an issue of safety, and that having a full tank may be necessary in an emergency). I thought I could slide until tomorrow. I didn’t think He’d have any reason to be driving my truck, and so I assumed I’d be able to get away with it. The sad part of this is that I actually noticed and that I consciously decided to break the rule. Usually, I do things like this without thought, and even though I haven’t done it on purpose, I still often get a punishment.

Take the forgotten receipts. I’m supposed to keep my receipts throughout the week and then provide them to Him when He does the bills/checkbook on the weekend. Invariably, I lose one or two or forget to ask for a copy when I get something small like a coffee. Even though there is often a punishment for this, I haven’t done anything to directly subvert His expectations of me. And I walk away feeling okay about myself…maybe a little remorseful for having been lackluster at following through, but not guilty. 

The gas-gauge thing…I thought that through. I actually decided not to do something I knew He wanted me to do.

So, last night’s spanking…I deserved it.

It isn’t often that I thank Him for punishing me, but this time, I need to.

Also, in the consideration of this, I reviewed our rules (which I really should do more often…like weekly. There are some things that have fallen by the wayside.

I’m not:
writing EVERY day
working out
sending a photo every time I masturbate
sharing my progress with training myself to squirt on command (hell, I’m not even training myself)
shaving weekly (I’m letting that get way out of control)
sending videos/pics to Him weekly
placing myself out of my sexual comfort zone monthly

So, I suppose this weekend’s “marriage talk” should probably involve a re-evaluation and discussion of these rules. We’ve both let them be sort of “forgotten.” And while I am responsible for living up to them, even when He isn’t looking, He is responsible for holding me to them. This D/s thing is a shared responsibility that I think we both need to focus more on because it makes us better people when we do it successfully. That means, I shouldn’t be the only one reviewing the rules. Because we all know…a rule that isn’t enforcedisn’t a rule.

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