Journal 9/15/2019 p.m.

Yet another weekend of little “moving in” projects. Seems like it was just Friday and now I am back to work in the morning.

And I had such high hopes for our sex life this weekend.

Friday night, I went to bed early – even though I’d been rather horny earlier in the day. Since it was a “no-panty” day, I’d definitely been thinking about Him more than usual at work.

Woke up Saturday morning with the specific plan to have sex, so I shaved (a thing I am supposed to do on a regular basis, but that has been sorely neglected during the last month). In fact, it has been so scarily long since I did it that I found a boil-type in-grown hair hiding underneath it all. Instead of benefiting from my handiwork by feeling His tongue between my labia (as He had promised), I found myself laying on the bed, naked and whining as He needled and pinched. I wiggled and arched, but it was in response to pain rather than pleasure. Afterward, He threw an “I told you so” at me, pointing out that if I’d kept it up better, that ingrown hair wouldn’t have happened. And He’s right.

I do, at least feel myself “coming back,” my brain calming and focusing more on us that on moving or working.

We didn’t have sex.

But I want to.

In the grocery store today, as we stood waiting at the deli counter, I wrapped my arms around Him and told Him that I loved him. He eyed me sideways and asked what I was up to.

I kind of felt bad that He thought I was up to something. That I don’t touch Him or hold Him out of the blue enough to make an action like that “ordinary.”

Guess that is something to work on.

When we got home, I started chores, and immediately began to feel overwhelmed. So much to accomplish in so little time. He had to run an errand, we were supposed to go to a family dinner, and I had a list a mile long. Plus I had hoped to write.

He took my head in His hands, pet my face slowly until I calmed down and started to laugh. I told Him He didn’t need to pet me. But, He kept doing it…tactilely dealing with my anxiety, like one might do with an autistic child. I’m certain that He’d hold me down until I stopped fussing if He thought it would work.

Anyhow, we re-wrote our plans for the afternoon and decided to stay home and get some things done.

Thankfully, it left time for finger foods on the couch and a TV show (and this quick entry).

I love that man.

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