(I wish I’d thought of doing this when Marie Rebel posted her Retreat prompt, but I just didn’t have things together enough in my head.)
My writing mojo goes through seasons, just like anything else. There are times during the year when I have more time to write, but that doesn’t always mean I have the impetus. In fact, more often than not, when the time is available, my brain goes into hibernation.
A few posts back, I wrote about my “crazy cycle” – how my ups and downs follow a pretty predictable path during the year.
And all of it revolves around my job.
I start work in September every year, so in August, my brain goes into overdrive – planning and coming up with ideas to begin a new year. My creative focus shifts like a planet on its axis. I become manic (though that is tempered quite a bit with medication these days) and my libido sets itself aside.
By December, I’ve got things at work under control and I’m ready to recharge. Winter Break usually sees a resurgence in my writing…and my libido comes back full tilt.
June brings me, exhausted, to summer vacation, and even though I have loads more time to write, I often find myself unmotivated to do much of anything besides catch up on shows and read. Funny though, my libido is still pretty good at this time…so it’s not always the writing that is necessary to keep my libido strong…it’s simply keeping the sex train running on a regular rotation.
This year, we’ve also got the move. I wrote about this earlier this summer, too, because it’s how we started our summer. Moving is always stressful, but we weren’t really prepared for this one. We found “the perfect house” well before we were ready to sell our current one, but we pulled our shit together and managed to put an offer on the house and put our own up for sell within a week. It was a contingency offer (not the greatest), but it was accepted, and we figured our home would sell quickly since our market is great right now. Unfortunately, it didn’t go that way, and we ended up having to do some financial acrobatics to secure our new home.
So, we’re still trying to sell our current home, we move into our new home next week (and register our son for middle school…and have a weekend-long soccer tournament), and I go back to work the following week.
And I have to admit, “busy” doesn’t look good on me, folks. I’ve gone from doing basically nothing (because we’ve had to hold on to our pennies all summer) except keep the house spic and span for possible viewings and hover in limbo waiting…for an offer on our house and for a good time to start packing.
Now, limbo is over…and everything is going to happen all at once.
Honestly, I’ve been crap at keeping up my blog this summer. I started out with the best of intentions, all kinds of great plans, but I just didn’t have the creative steam to back it up.
It makes Mr. D nervous as hell. He sees me going into the “back to work” ether…my libido shrinking up and going into hibernation. In fact, he expects it. But I’m making a conscious effort to pull my head out of the “underneath” and back into the here and now.
I envy people who seek solace in sex and crave it more when the world around them is on fire. As an introvert, I tend to hole up in my brain when the world begins to spin. I cut myself off, maybe go into a novel to get my mind off of things and relax my synapses.
But what heals…what truly holds me together? Two things…one, poetry. Two, touch.
It’s been a long damn time since I wrote a poem.
Poetry is natural medicine; it is like a homeopathic tincture derived from the stuff of life itself–your experience. Poems distill experience into the essentials. Our personal experiences touch the common ground we share with others. The exciting part of this process is that poetry used in this healing way helps people integrate the disparate, even fragmented parts of their life. Poetic essences of sound, metaphor, image, feeling and rhythm act as remedies that can elegantly strengthen our whole system–physical, mental and spiritual.
Poems speak to us when nothing else will. Poetry helps us to feel our lives rather than be numb….
Poetry provides guidance, revealing what you did not know you knew before you wrote or read the poem. This moment of surprising yourself with our own words of wisdom or of being surprised by the poems of others is at the heart of poetry as healer.
Poetic Medicine – John Fox
As I begin to uproot my home and move to another, losing my balance and losing my sense of place to find a new one, both in life (a new home…a deeper sense of our D/s relationship) and in work (a new position and focus), I don’t want to focus on fear or loss or the stress that comes with change…though stress is exactly the first thing I feel when I think of “new” or “different.” Instead, I want to focus on opportunity and possibility. Hope.
This year…just a few days ago, Mr. D and I celebrated our 13th wedding anniversary. Today is also the 13th…and so, for the Erotic Journal Challenge…I am putting things on hold as I move through this transition…and instead of a new prompt, I am offering up a 13-day retreat into the art form of your choice, be it photography, poetry, painting, sculpture. Share the thing that inspires you…explain or don’t…show us your result. You can share every day or just show us the highlights.
Feel freely encouraged to either go your own way with this, take a break from the EJC and memes altogether, or match it up with other meme prompts to get your retreat work maximum exposure. I’ll provide some daily mental fodder if you need it, but see if you can set aside a solid hour (or a decadent two). Create a space that feels relaxing and give your brain a chance to just create whatever your heart is sending forth… Retreat. Breathe. Relax. And re-enter your day with intention and purpose.
After these 13 days, I’ll offer up the rest of September to “catch up” on prompts. Go back and do one that you missed. Go back and look at a prompt in a new way.
New prompts will begin in October. (I’ll update the EJC main page so you know what dates and prompts to expect.)
I need this, loves. And maybe you do, too.
Click on the image below to save it to your desktop.
Then link back to this post.
Feel free to use these prompts (or not) to get your ideas flowing…
1–Consider your sacred places. Focus of one thing in one place that symbolizes something important in your life.
2–What metaphor would you choose to describe your erotic (and/or creative) self?
3–Who is your erotic muse? Who has inspired you or influenced you the most, sexually/erotically?
4–What physical, mental, or spiritual attributes does your erotic self embody? Describe the essence of your erotic being through metaphor or simile.
5–What direction do you want to go next?
6–What kinds of self-care do you need?
7–What are you sorry for? (let go of the guilt)
8–What can you do better…and how?
9–Where do you hurt? Why?
10–What inspires you? How can you add more of this to your life?
11–What is your erotic story?
12–If you could draw a map of your erotic journey, what would it look like?
13–What is erotic?
Also, feel free to take “Retreat” literally, backing fully away from writing and blogging and creating. Thinking and refilling the well is important in life. Maybe you need 13 days of reading…or watching films…or visiting museums…or playing…or self-care.
And then you can come back, refreshed and brimming with ideas, to share what you have learned or processed after.
The link-up will remain open until next Sept 30th, 11:55 pm (PST), to give you time to fit in your 13 Days wherever and whenever you can/choose.
You can share each of your entries separately or set up a category page. Whatever works best for you. Share as you go…or share at the end. Do the prompts, or don’t, in any order that works for you, interpreting them however you see fit.