That’s a Powerful Little Sucker! (Paloqueth “Clitoral Sucking Vibrator”)

When Paloqueth contacted me in March about testing one of their products, I decided to jump at the opportunity. Reviewing products isn’t normally my gig, but I figured I could try to put my own spin on this thing and branch out to experiment with a new style of toy I normally wouldn’t buy.

They initially offered up a wand-style “massager,” but having been given one of these years ago by a girlfriend and finding it way too powerful and unforgiving for my super-sensitive lady parts, I opted to try something different. So, rather than going for a regular dildo-style vibrator (of which I already have a few…and seriously, the thought just bored me) I went for the “Clitoral Sucking Vibrator with Sonic Technology.” It sounded and looked a little like alien technology, and it was different than any other toy I’ve tried.

I waited with baited breath for it to come in the mail, and while it DID reach me in just a few days (shipped through Amazon), my post office wouldn’t accept it because I’d had it sent to my sobriquet, rather than my real name. Stupid, yes, but the company was amazing (as was the post office, because they added my pen name to the list of the people living at my address) and they sent a new one out right away, no questions.

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The Unveiling

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The day it came, I opened the discreetly labeled cardboard box to find this sleek black box:

And I opened it to find this…

I was a little surprised to see that it charged by USB. The connecting end is also not a size that would be easy to replace, so now that my rotten kitten has chewed through the cord, I’ll have to either contact the company to replace it or just call this a failed experiment. If you have a “cord chewer” at home or are prone to losing cables, this may be a factor in your selection of this product.

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The Maiden Voyage

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Charged and ready to go, my husband held the little purple toy in his hand. It’s a smooth soft cover, but the toy itself is solid, and the white suction tip is soft and flexible. It’s just big enough to fit the tip of my pinky into the first knuckle. I can’t fit my forefinger in all the way, but I found it easy to clean with a q-tip.

Turning it on, we noticed the buzz was loud and and hungry, and I was instantly intimidated and apprehensive. I’m a pretty sensitive girl, so the level of power this little thing seemed to be emitting made me nervous.

There are seven modes, and after running through each, my Husband choose the first, a strong, continuous stream of vibration. Pressing it against my left nipple, the less sensitive of the two, I jumped to life and squealed. He tried it on my right (the one that can barely stand a light pinch) and I nearly came unglued.

The toy legitimately “sucks” you in. And I was pretty nervous to let Him near my clitoris with it. But, in the name of experimentation and to help you fine folks make good decisions about prospective bedroom accouterments (obviously, that is the only reason), I spread my legs and held my breath.

Holy fucking crap! I nearly came off the mattress and flew across the room.

Nope. Nope. Nope.

We tried a different mode, and still…nope.

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Another try…

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Today, I tried it again, just to make sure.

Alone this time, I took off my clothes, breathed in and out a few times, and turned it on. First, I tried it on my nipples. And, lo and behold, I actually kind of liked it. I tried all of the modes, letting it suck and pull at my nipples, the vibrations diverting sensation and reaction directly to my clit. It was an instant turn on.

So, standing, I raised one leg and set my foot on the top of the toilet lid. With one hand, I spread my labia to uncover my clitoris, and then pressed the toy to the front of my vagina until is latched on (which it actually does).

It was too much.

So, I pulled it away and moved to the next mode, a pulse.

This time, I could handle it for just a few beats longer, and I could see how this could definitely bring me to orgasm very quickly. I tried the other modes and determined that the second mode (an even pulse) was probably the best for me, so I lay down on the bed and within seconds I was lurching upward, unable to keep the toy attached to my clitoris any longer. It was intense and sudden. Not necessarily my favorite type of orgasm, because there was no build up and no time to savor. It was just there and then it was too much to stand even the touch of my own fingers.

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Cost, Specs, Materials & Care

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Cost: normally $36.69, on sale now for $29.99

This product is made in China and, according to the users manual, is made out of 100% silicone (and thus requires simple cleaning with soap and water after each use and should be kept in a cool dry place out of direct sunlight). It is designed to “fit comfortably in your hand” and is waterproof (handy for the shower and for those of us of the gushing or squirting variety).

The product manual boasts that the product has a “whisper-quiet” motor so “you will not need to worry about your surroundings in a reasonable environment.” I do not agree with this statement; I found the vibrator too loud to use in my closed bedroom with people in the living room. It is much louder than my other regular dildo-style vibrators.

The user manual also says is has non-contact technology, but I have no idea what that means, since it obviously requires product-to-skin contact to work its magic.

And, while the user manual also says the product is shipped with a travel bag, mine did not come with one.

It’s an easy-to-use product with only two buttons: the power button and the mode-shifting button (which is indicated by a cute little emoji-like smiley face). The modes are basically:

1. Continuous vibration
2. Steady slow pulse
3. Steady quick pulse
4. Steady fast pulse
5. A revving pulse that seems to flutter inside the suction cup
6. A variation of #5
7. A slower version of #5

And there is no way to change the intensity of the modes (if there were, I think I would like this toy a lot more).

There is a hole at the base of the device meant for the connecting end of the USB cord.

It took about three hours to charge up from the box, and the instructions warn of overcharging (which can damage the battery).

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Warranty & Company Offers

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Paloqueth offers a 30-day money-back guarantee, a 12-month manufacturer warranty, and a 1-year extended warranty.

The user manual also notes a “Free Lube, Toy Cleaner, and Sex Dice Giveaway” and a “Free Trial Product Program.” If you are interested in getting involved in this program, contact the company at support.us@paloqueth.com.

If you really want to do this on a regular basis and become a sex toy tester for them, click HERE.

They are also looking for “Brand Ambassadors.” The company says, “We believe that sexual pleasure is everyone’s birthright and that education opens the door to better sexual health, comfort, and expression to everyone.” Hallelujah! Right? Anyhow, they are looking to work with bloggers and other social media “influencers” to spread the word about their products. If you are interested in working with them, send an email to support@paloqueth.com with the subject line “Brand Ambassador Request.” You can also register for this program on their website.

They have a lovely, inviting website that is easy to navigate and appealing to the eye.

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Pros and Cons

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Pros: Probably the best thing I can say is that the company seems like a really positive business. When they contacted me, they allowed me to pick any product I wanted and sent it in just a few days.They even tried to work around my trip to London for Eroticon. And despite the difficulty with the post office, they sent out a new product right away.

This is a well-made and simple device. It is made with body-safe materials, is waterproof, and is easy to clean.

Cons: There is no way to change the intensity of the vibrations, which means for us sensitive gals, the toy is a bit much. It is also too loud for me to use in the house when I’m trying to be discreet. The USB cable has a proprietary connector at the device end that is not a standard size, which means replacing it won’t be easy if you lose it (or have a cord-chewing beast with fur living in your home).

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 Final Words…

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While I may not have loved this product, it’s not because the product was faulty. It’s simply because it didn’t jive with my body. I’m too sensitive for a toy like this one, and because it doesn’t have a way to change the intensity of the vibration (only the mode), it’s not a toy I’m likely to turn to very often. But…if you like a vibrator that is intense, and your clitoris can stand (or craves) powerful and direct stimulation, this might be just the product for you.

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Disclosure: Paloqueth offered me any product from their website for free in trade for my unbiased review.