Ever shot cum out of your nose?

Yah…you read that title right.  And my answer is a resounding YES.  As of last night.  And, because I’m a glutton for punishment and love sharing my own stupidity so that I’m not the only one laughing at myself…here you go…true story:

Mr. LL pulls all the bedcovers down to the foot of the bed to get them out of our way.  He then proceeds to go down on me like a damned professional (fuck, he’s awesome at that!), gets me good and soaking wet and then fucks me until I orgasm with a splash.  But, he’s in it for the long haul, and since we’d had sex earlier in the day, he was going to last for quite a while (a fabulous quality in a man).

There we are, fucking like beasts…several orgasms down – for me – and one that just plain won’t come (pun intended) – for him.  I really hate it when he doesn’t come, so I work especially hard, accepting the challenge.  I got on top and rode him slowly (which often works), contracting my muscles around his cock, rising all the way up…almost to the tip of the head, and then slowly back down, grinding into his balls.  And still…fail.

The only thing left to be done was to suck him off.  But, I wasn’t exasperated yet, and I enjoy seeing him climax, so it was all worth it to me.  I’ve never been a quitter, and I really hate leaving my man unsatisfied (though sometimes, it just doesn’t happen…a rare thing, but not unheard of).  I can honestly say that I just don’t feel as if the deed is “done” if both of us don’t get our rocks off…and I so love to see his face in ecstasy and feel the heat of his seed explode into me.  Really, it’s like the 4th of July fireworks finale, but more an emotional imperative.  I pout if it doesn’t happen.

Alright, so I’m there between his splayed thighs, my ass in the air (wouldn’t it have been nice to have someone back there encouraging me?), licking around the sides of his balls, up the sides of his dick, circling the head, ever so slowly.  I let him go deep into my mouth, to the back of my throat, rubbing my tongue up and down the ridge on the bottom of his penis, from base to tip.  He was trying so hard to accommodate me…to let go of his load.  He started grinding his hips upward, pushing his cock into me, fucking my face with gusto.  And finally…finally…his breath stopped and his body became rigid; I braced myself for the flood, which started out small, and then streamed and spurted until he was spent.

Now, I’m going to admit right here, that I’m not big on swallowing.  Never have been.  I love sucking cock, but I just don’t enjoy the flavor of semen.  He’s cool with this and knows that once he’s come, I’ll make a quick bee-line for the bathroom sink, spit, rinse, and jump right back in bed for afterglow snuggling.

This is where the trouble begins.  Remember those bedcovers heaped at the bottom of the bed?  And let me add that we have a platform bed that puts us up three feet above the carpeted floor.  I sat up, my mouth full of of come, put my hand out to stabilize myself, and realized – a bit too late- that I was further down at the bottom of the bed than I had thought.  My hand caught nothing but air and, as my momentum forward had already begun, the blankets under my ass began to carry me down.  I rolled off the bed with the heap of covers, right onto the dog (who looked at me like, “What the fuck?  I was sleeping!  Why would you do that to me?”).  I started to laugh, tried to hold the come in…but – as you already know from the title of this post – it sputtered out between my clenched lips and sprayed out of my nose…all over the wall, the treadmill, the carpet, and the dog.  Poor thing has to listen to daddy make mommy scream night after night – and then this.

We laughed so damned hard as I cleaned the dripping liquid off the wall and the floor.  This is the joy of married sex, and I’m thankful for it.  If I had been single – or in new relationship, I might have been mortified…completely and cripplingly embarrassed.  But, instead, we shared a fabulous laugh at my expense.  I’ve been giggling under my breath about it all day long.


  • angel shrout

    Ok I love your page but the black on white is hell on my eyes.. aackkk. This I would have cracked up at as well. I am over her rolling even picturing it and thinking this is so something that I would do, well except I like to swallow soo I wouldn't have had it out my nose.. but the rest.. totally a me thing.

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